Distance

I can feel myself slipping from the people I love. There’s a growing distance between me and them. I keep on messing up. My mother probably hates me right now. I don’t have the greatest relationship with my dad either. My brother is even ignoring me right now. My friends, I don’t know if they still even know I exist.

This day is one of the worst that I ever had. I know that I’ve had some faults and I’ve caused hurt and it sucks because I feel so guilty yet I am hurt too. It’s just that it became too much for me to take. Ugly words has been said to me and I had to pretend that I didn’t care about any of it at all.

I still can remember those words, I’m useless, ungrateful, that I’m too proud of myself when I haven’t even achieved anything yet..even I was accused of putting my friend first before my family, even my love for reading was made into a bad thing.

Then, I threw back words in my defense. I was so angry at myself for the starting the fight. I love my pride so much. I know that I’m the person who’s on the wrong side now.

It just sucks. Everything sucks in my life right now. I want to cry but I can’t because that will make me feel like I’m putting myself in a soap opera. This is just a mess. I want to run away.

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