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What I didn’t regret

You know those moments you think of all the things you did in the past and play it over and over inside your head?

That’s actually a very common scenario to me every night when I get to my bed and reflect on my life. I realized that there’s nothing much that I regret in my life. After all, it’s what I wanted. It was my decision to do that. So, it’s pretty useless for me to regret on stuff. Instead of focusing on regrets, I think I should focus on things I didn’t regret.

I remembered that moment I turned my back on nursing. It was one of the hardest decisions I’ve made in my life. I thought that I was such a coward from not taking that opportunity but I guess it’s good that I did it. Why? Because I realized I’m not yet ready. I know that the world won’t wait for me to get ready but in a job like nurses do..It’s really scary because the patients’ lives are in my hands and I can’t afford to make big mistakes. Yes I was scared and I know that it’s normal. I didn’t choose to face my fear though instead I ran away. Up to this day, I am still thankful though, that I did that. It opened up other opportunities and experiences for me.

Since quitting temporarily from my profession, I decided to pursue my love for writing. I enjoyed my job as a freelance article writer. It worked on me. I was able to do writing for living for 2 years already. I think it brought me lots of lessons. I was actually proud of myself because I was got one of my dream jobs.

For now, I think I am in the crossroads of my life. I don’t know if I should pursue my career but I miss working in the hospital and it’s so hard to get a working experience here in my country. Is it normal that I don’t know what I want to do with my life? I feel like going crazy sometimes. I need some time to find myself (lol).

My point here is that I do not think of my past mistakes as  regrets but rather lessons. I always believe that there are reasons behind the things that happen to our lives. Though the reasons may not still be clear for me, I believe that by that I will be guided on what I should do with my life.

Hopefully, I’ll figure out what I’ll do with my life. It’s totally confusing. ­čśŤ

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So Yesterday

My first post for 2014 is here. Yes, I am sticking to my New Year’s Resolution of blogging everyday (though I know it’s totally useless to have resolutions). Anyway, I am going to push this as much as I can.

Today, I feel like talking about letting go of the past and regrets. It’s so yesterday, just like I always tell myself. There are times in which I remember events that make me cringe internally, wishing that I never did such things, and making me feel embarrassed about why I did those stuff.

What does it really take to move on?

I guess I don’t have the exact formula for that. The closest thing that I could come up with to do that is ACCEPTANCE. Like most people say, letting go and accepting things will help you move on. I think that is true. It works for me. Though there may be those moments when I am reminded of the things I regret, I am trying and trying my best to accept what I did because well it’s over. It’s so yesterday. I can’t do anything to change it anymore. Instead, I should see it as a lesson and never let myself do it anyway.

We are not perfect. We make me mistakes. Nobody does not. I think people should remember this instead of trying to be so perfect. Forgive yourself for your mistakes. Most importantly, love yourself because you were so strong to overcome what you just went through.

Again, Happy New Year Everyone!